some of my students tell me retiring is the same as quitting, and i wonder if, in some respects, they are right. in an odd way, i feel a bit like i'm giving up on my profession - not on kids, just on the the way they're guided through the education process. i have always tried so hard to make learning fascinating, fun and joyous for kids, as it is for me, and i'm just not convinced that's happening any more. sometimes i feel responsible, like i should stick around and try more, try harder. and sometimes i feel like i should just move on and attempt to find a better way. clearly, i have chosen the latter and, at this point, there's no turning back. but i can't help but wonder if i'm doing the right thing.
i have taken a part time position that involves children and books, two elements that are a huge part of my present job. although this position will be very different than what i'm doing now, i am hoping having those two constants will help make my transition easier.
as i blogged last fall, i am not a fan of change. i've been trying hard to be excited about this next stage of my life, and i hope and trust i eventually will be. but for this next week, i think things might just be a little scary and uncertain. and, most likely, a little bit sad.