time flies

does it seem to you like we just started the new year? and look - here's the end of the month already. used to be that january dragged, filled with grey skies and cold and snow. early to bed nights and stay inside days, one after the other each the same and in endless succession. now the days fly and are gone. is it that im busier? that im older? that i have a better concept of what time really is? i sit here on the last night of the month wondering what happened to it. the only poor comfort i have is the knowledge that tomorrow there will be another new calendar picture to look at for february. the shortest month of the year.

academia 101

tonight i taught my first undergraduate class in this room. i think it went well in spite of my nervousness. but how odd it is to be on the other side of a desk after being a university student for so many years! someone actually called me professor and i almost laughed out loud. after class i sat in my office, small and shared and in the basement of the education building. but its a hallowed space where one of my favorite instructors began her tenure with the university. would that i follow in her footsteps...

wonderment

yesterday the girl sent me this taken a few days ago at almost 20 weeks. i keep going back and looking at it just one more time. i am awestruck by the image. i see the profile. i see a nose. i see bones in the arm and even in the fingers. the parents thinks the baby is already thumbing his nose at us. but i prefer to think he - or she - is waving at grammie. and i cant wait to finally meet this small person who is my babys baby.

red squirrel

spotted this little guy sitting in the lilac in the middle of a flurry. tail all tucked up near his back for warmth i think. later he managed to raid the bird feeder by climbing inside the squirrel proof wire surround. when hed eaten his fill of the chickadees sunflower seed he bounded to the ground and began to stick his face in the snow. not sure if he was chasing the seed with a little water or washing up after a meal. finally he retreated under my house. apparently he doesnt live too far from the best squirrel restaurant on the road.

the surprise inside

im a coffee drinker so i dont often buy tea. maybe a couple of boxes a year. and every box for years and years has had one of these small porcelain figurines in it. and invariably i get the box with the cat in it. the side of the package suggests collecting them but really - how many tiny glass cats all the same color all the same pose can one person have? how do you display them? do you line them up parade style - a rank and file of cloned kitties? this one will eventually follow all the others to the rubbish. and ill keep sporadically buying tea and hoping that finally i find the rabbit.

blue light special

the yard with late afternoon shadows makes the white snow take on a tinge of blue. note the winding trails down the slope. there are more beyond the bounds of the photo. looks like mice have been snowboarding all the way from the summit down to the house at the base of the hill.

best seat in the house

for the life of me i dont know why this cat doesnt self combust. a long haired black cat sleeping on a brick hearth directly under the ash drawer of a constantly lit woodstove sounds like a disater waiting to happen. how much heat can one cat absorb? is there a feline flash point? every time i go by i scoot him out. and he finds his way back again. good thing hes still got about six lives left - he may need a few of them.

at the feeder

a junco watches the approach as this chickadee comes in for a landing.

the ice cometh, man

it has to be the coldest night weve had this winter. snow does a wild dance outside the window. gusty winds blow and send drafts through this old house. i wear three shirts and a fleece vest and still need to wear my gloves with the fingers cut off so i can type. best to turn up the heat i guess.

dad

this is my father. in life, he was a navigator in the air force, a salesman, a huge red sox and patriots fan, and one helluva piano player. when i was little he could make things disappear before our eyes and make quarters come out of our ears. he could name all the stars. he would give us logic problems and not tell us the answers. he not only knew the tune and the words to any song you could name, he could sing it and play it too. he took us to the beach in a station wagon. he brought us chocolate covered halavah from boston. he took his accordian and every kid in the neighborhood from house to house christmas caroling. and he used to kiss my mother in the kitchen right in front of us. this is how i try to remember him. i miss him still. and today is his birthday - same birthday as robert e lee.

i think i can...

ah, the start of the new year brings with it good intentions and steadfast resolutions. one of mine is to try to take better care of myself. walk. sleep more. eat better. at least for a month or so until i inevitably lose my resolve. pictured is lunch. 4 points.

brrrrrr

so cold this morning that the windows were frosted on the inside. so cold that i had to rifle around in the closet to find the fleece slippers. so cold that i wore double socks. and so cold that my car would not start. this is the winter ive been waiting for. so be careful what you wish for.

glassflake

the girl gave it to me for christmas. a pressed snowflake lovely and delicate and made of glass. i hung it in the kitchen window this morning as it stormed outside. sleet and freezing rain all day with just enough snow to make things white. the birds feeding frenzy finally came this morning and i was home to witness it. no work for me today. although i did lots sitting here at the table watching the storm just beyond the green of this glass.

for the birds

a few chickadees at the feeder today. a junco on the ground. a titmouse in the lilac. later this afternoon a squirrel. and very little else. with the forecast of a storm i expected a feeding frenzy. but for the birds it was apparently just another saturday - and business as usual.

melodymania

the song just will not leave. for days and days its been in there circling round and round in the inner workings of my ear, racing through my head, escaping temporarily from my lips or throat, only to return to my ear to once again drive me mad. an earworm its called. stuck tune syndrome. "repetunitis. " this time its eine kleine nachtmusik thats making me crazy. but at least its mozart. the most relentless earworm i ever had was the shadow of your smile. much to the dismay and annoyance of those around me, i whistled that song for years.

relish redux

at the risk of beating a subject to death - look. if you cant see click to make the picture bigger. because someone is actually trying to make a living manufacturing this. maybe its catching on. perhaps weve started something. maybe next year i'll think about seasonal employment towards years end.

home fires

this is our second winter burning wood. weve gone back to it for a third time now after trying more conventional means of heating. first time we had a woodstove was almost thirty years ago when we moved here from points south. having little experience with burning wood, i thought it would be folksy and homey and easy to do. but i spent the better part of that first winter leaning against the counter in the kitchen with snow up to the windowsills watching that old cookstove and just waiting for the moment flames would erupt from it and burn down my house. i kid you not. woodstoves have come a long way since those bygone years. thankfully so have i.

the turnin' of the broom

every family has its quirky holiday traditions and this is one of ours. on thanksgiving night after dinner is finished, dishes are done, leftovers are packed away in the fridge, and evening candles are lit, we "turn the broom" to usher in the christmas season. this in-name-only broom hangs by the fireplace all year long. on its twig handle a carved and painted santa face smiles nose to the wall. turning this santa around to face frontward is the first decorating that happens here. conversely its the last thing we do as we put christmas away for another year. and today, the day after epiphany, in a much more timely fashion than in years past, i sadly reluctantly turned the broom.

thaw?

this is my almost bare foot photographed today out in the yard on my way to the compost pile. in the middle of winter. i even sat outside and read for a while - a long while! - after i made this shot. downright balmy out there today with singing birds and fog lifting off what little snow was left at the edge of the woods. perhaps this extreme is what would normally have been a january thaw. if i didnt have calendars all around me, if i didnt know new years was last week, i could have close my eyes and just imagined it was april.

i told you so

poking around in the refrigerator this evening and look what i found. behind all the holiday cream cheese that never got eaten because we already had some and didnt really need to buy more. way in the back sandwiched between the maple syrup and the outdated sour cream. shimmering like a cranberry jewel - and stuck to the shelf. see it tucked back there where i predicted it would be? if you dont know what it is, just reference the november archive (right).

i told you so. its new years tradition.

seeds in stores in january

this is usually the very first sign of spring for me. seeing the new seasons seeds on display always cheers me and and makes me hopeful about the eventual coming of warm weather. but not so this year. winter has not been winter very long. just last week the first snow accumulated and did not melt away. but temperatures are still not very cold and the forecast for the next few days is for daytime temps in the 40s and maybe even 50s. and those temperatures sound like the spring that im not yet anticipating because it hasnt even been winter long enough yet.

on the 10th day of christmas

yes it is. its still christmas here. everything remains as it was two weeks ago. except of course the presents are open and the stockings are empty. the week between christmas and new years, i rationalize that its the holiday season after all - the decorations can stay out. after new years, i swing into epiphany mode. there are twelve days of christmas for goodness sake. i can leave the tree up for a few more of them. after january 6th i begin to run out of excuses. so i have at least three more days to enjoy christmas at home. unless i can come up with some creative reason to leave it all out til martin luther king day.

icy new year

opened my eyes this morning to see ice covering the branches of the lilac outside the window. it rained all day and ice formed everywhere. on rocks on walks on benches and rooflines. as the temperatures increased and fog settled in, i took some shots of the crabapple tree in the yard, each tiny frozen fruit encased in a beautiful crystal coat.

auld lang syne

new years eve i stay home. always. its a quiet reflective night for me, recalling events of the past year, anticipating the wonders of the year to come. heres a photo i just took, out in the yard a few minutes before midnight, walking around in the snow under the almost full moon. someone is snug and cozy, happily sleeping in the woodpile this cold moonlit new years eve. hope you are snug and cozy where you are, too. happy new year.

bring 'em on

finally our first sustained snowfall. tiny little flakes that last and its been snowing all day. enough so that the roads are being plowed. enough to delay my moms flight to florida. enough to keep me in jammies all day. the feeder is filled and ready, you chickadees and titmice and blue jays. so come on down.

slow motion

snow this morning as i awoke. big fat lazy flakes floating down all so slow. i sat in the kitchen rocker for much of the early morning, reading my book and drinking my coffee, stopping often to look out and marvel at the beauty of the snow. a lovely, peaceful way to begin my day.

forevergreen

ever wonder what happens to wreaths and christmas trees after the holidays are over? oh i dont mean the kind of greens in lobbies and living rooms, on front doors or in windows. we know they land in compost piles or in a heap at the dump - but only after serving some poor purpose in illuminating someones holiday or dressing up a dwelling. what of the unsold wreaths, the cut-but-never-even-purchased trees? have they given of themselves for naught? i asked all this of a young man who was loading still bundled trees into the back of his white pickup truck. we burn them he said - and then theyre just gone.

paperwhite narcissus

in mid-december i try to remember to plant these bulbs. if i time it right they bloom for christmas. fragile white flowers clustered atop long thin stems filling the room with a most heavenly scent. it seems i am the only one who enjoys it, though. some cannot even smell it. and the girl insists they smell like feet.

what child is this?

its my grandchild!

today was the day s&s announced to the family that they are pregnant. what an amazing christmas present it was for everyone!

silent night

finally its still after a night of family and gifts, food and music and merriment. tonight i wait in the quiet to see christmas come in. tomorrow night i stay up to see it out. i can sleep on the 26th. the kid in me wants to experience as much of christmas day as i can.

an offering from the aformentioned kid: a recipe for a decadant chocolate sauce that i serve only at christmas. here we are full of christmas tradition - and christmas joy. may your days be merry and bright...

the night before christmases

these four copies of the night before christmas are all iilustrated by different artists. same story, different drawings. the girl and i have at least fifty maybe sixty more copies of the same story, each with drawings and paintings and photos unique to the illustrator. every christmas for years and years weve given each other another new version. i have my favorites - the one by tasha tudor, another by mary englebrieght, another by anita lobel - and the one illustrated by the girl herself when she was seven. we have versions old and new, large and small, flat and pop-up. versions with reindeer and mice as reindeer and dogs as reindeer. some with donner, others with donder, and still others with dunder. each one so different from the other yet they all convey the same familiar story. im hoping santa brings me the will moses version this christmas. hint, hint.

chasing the moon

now i anticipate the waxing of the moon each month. it began again just last night and was only 1% illuminated. how thin that must be! armed with binoculars and a free hour i set out to find it. this moon sets in the evening soon after the sun. but even with a clear and cloudless view of the west, even with infinite patience and perseverance, i could not find it. another chance tonight with 8% illumination - but this sunset was lost in grey overcast skies. tomorrow nights moon will be at 10%. at this point ill even settle for that.

winter solstice

this night is the longest of the year. outside in the darkness silent stars sing with orion high in the sky. as we burn bayberry candles for luck in the year that follows, time sets about to reverse itself, changing course and beginning the slow forward movement back toward the days of light.

christmas wrapper

this is about as far along as i am with wrapping presents. i hauled the rolls of paper out last night then ended up distracted here. i think ill get it done though. the plan is to sit for the next two nights and wrap and watch all the christmas videos i havent watched yet either. this post may explain why every year i hang onto all things christmas until well into january.

santa

there are probably two dozen or more santas around the house at christmastime. some old and some new some wood or plastic or quilted or stuffed. two i made myself, several years ago. the others are gifts or purchases from craft fairs that id bought to give away and then couldnt part with. this small santas a favorite - made by the girl a few years back with a secret talent she'd been hiding from us all.

holiday rant

what is this you say? garments fallen from a clothesline? tarp by the side of the road? a statue about to be unveiled? no, its one of those wretched inflatable christmas decorations - in its deflated state. this ones a huge snowman - see the shrunken scarf? ive also seen santas and reindeer and sleighs and presents. many of them laying there lifeless on front lawns and beside doorways. is there something i dont know about these things? is there a reason why so many are flattened by day? is there no protocol, no inflatable etiquette for such displays? in the spirit of the holiday season it would seem the festive thing, nay the responsible thing, would be to keep them upright and distended and waving in the breeze to passers-by like me.

architecture

yet another reason to look up. so much to see on this building. i think the brickwork appeals to me the most especially in the round parts above the windows. and the three colors are wonderful. click to see it in the large version. this photo taken in the midst of a very lengthy christmas shopping expedition in a very busy downtown location. shortly after i snapped it i lost my list. so i had to go home. too bad, huh? i dont think so.

wheels

this is my car. i love this car more than any other vehicle ive ever owned. ive had many subarus before but this ones my hands-down favorite vehicle ever. i like everything about it. the look, the drive, the handling. and its the closest thing to a midlife car im ever going to get. i love this car as much today as i did the day i bought it. now, look carefully: see the white rectangle on the dashboard? thats an envelope containing my final car payment. and we are off to the post office. so any day now, this truly will be my car.

december snow?

the most snow ive seen this month has been right here on this calendar. temps today close to 50 and folks walking downtown at noontime without coats. driving with the window down past lawns and yards i swear grass is beginning to green up. whats wrong with this picture? everything! and what's wrong with the picture in the picture? absolutely nothing!

december rain

rainy and grey today. the kind of day when the temperature doesnt fluctuate much from morning to evening. when the fog and mist only accentuate the late autumn pallor. and things all around you look the same when you return home as they did when you left hours earlier. normally the monochrome of a day like today doesnt bother me. but its december. its almost christmas. and i long for snow not rain to be reflected in the warm glow of the window candles.

new project

next semester im teaching a class at the nearby university. this is my first time teaching alone at that level. ive been working on developing the course for years and im really familiar with the content. but its still such a stretch for me. do i have to do it? no. do i want to do it? i think so. yet the mere thought of it creates real dissonance deep within me. this must be one of those opportunities to learn that i so naively waxed poetic about at thanksgiving.

dawns early light

when i was a kid i used to sit in the window overlooking the backyard and the brook and try to draw the winter sky. bare trees silhouetted against the grey sky. just a bunch of black lines. pen and ink. charcoal. pencil. how hard can it be? quite difficult indeed. not even a photo can capture its simple beauty.

balsam fir

two more weeks til christmas and time to get a tree. i chose a short one for $35, then had about $15 of it cut from the bottom. its so small it fit in the back seat of my car. the bottom branches will soon adorn buckets and windowboxes. the tiny tree will be perfect on the pine box in front of the living room windows. but the best part of the day was traveling the back roads at twilight with carols on the radio and christmas lights in the little towns. and breathing in the heady scent of the balsam, all the way home.

christmas bling

people in my line of work get a lot of jewelry as gifts. especially pins. especially at christmastime. i hauled out my collection recently so i wouldnt have to paw through the nonseasonal counterparts to get to the holiday baubles. i think theyre all here. its a decision each morning picking which to wear. so many choices. good thing there are 12 days of christmas.

the real deal

now this is what i call snow! fat flakes floating down, heavy on branches and benches. since i shot this the wind has picked up and is howling but the snow stays put. thin blanket of white outside and its beginning to look a lot like christmas. and winter. bring on the hot chocolate.

decorations

snapped this shot of a tree on a town common, all embellished for christmas. man-made decorations and natural ones, too!

morning snow on the roof

looking way up

calm and quiet today with filtered sun. i sense that it may be our last such day for a while. the weeks forecast calls for colder temperatures - and its about time. while i admit to being a weather junkie im certainly no meteorologist. but really, doesnt it look like these clouds rolling in from the west might be ushering in a little snow - perhaps??? i have my snow mocs at the ready, just in case.

looking up

when you look down you see all manner of interesting objects - small living things, rocks, sometimes a coin. but looking up is infinitely more interesting. there you find weathervanes, all of them different. and steeples of varying height and pitch and ornamentation. lightning rods around the perimeter of rooftops. chimneys short & wide and tall & thin. and wonderful architecture some of it old and some of it new. like this funky fence atop an old brick building in a downtown area.

25 days

every year i buy the girl an advent calendar. as shes gotten older the size of them has diminished but she still gets one, even in adulthood. this year i found two - this small one first and soon after another one, beautiful but huge, with santa and animals and lots of woods. breaking with tradition, she got the big one. and guess whos going to open all twenty-five windows on this tiny sparkly version?

btw, here's an online advent calendar i do every year.